This is an animal shunned by all, but Heidi’s heart is so enormous she has bid her handlers to make arrangements with the Long Island Animal Welfare Board granting Heidi and her estate sole legal custody of it. Yes, even though it is ugly and even though it is dead, Heidi’s love of animals is so all-encompassing that she is willing to open her HOME to this monstrous beast. Never before has nature spewed forth from its unwiped bowels a creature so sickening, so nauseating, so hideous to the eye and STILL Heidi’s heart and motives are so pure that the world-famous Montauk Monster will no longer be forced to forlornly lie on the beach, rotting in the sun. Heidi’s home is filled with the finest hand-made Amish furniture. A personalized Bugatti Veyron sits gleaming in her garage, which is so big it is not even connected to her house!!! Her draperies are fashioned from the finest gossamer and her wall-to-wall carpeting is as thick as the grass on a country club fairway. She has art on the walls from all the great artists of Europe and even Canada. Not exactly a pigpen, and yet she has unselfishly agreed to welcome this bloated, putrescent THING into her place of residence. Most of the locals have been demanding that the Montauk Monster be weighed down with old truck transmissions and sunk to the deepest part of the ocean with the whale droppings and muck. Heidi says no. Her unselfishness and kindness to pets sets an example for one and all. Are you paying attention, Michael Vick!!!
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